Things I have learnt about life: Lesson 1

I know its always easy to call oneself a philosopher, as its easy to call oneself spiritual, or a believer, these things can’t be measured. We can’t measure if someone is a philosopher, spiritual leader or even a believer, we just need to take their word for it and their actions. The problem is actions lie, and I don’t even want to talk about how sinful words are. It’s weird cos we never think of how much lying we commit in a day, even those days when we don’t say one significant lie. Our lies begin with, “There was a big traffic jam on the highway”, goes on to, “I am busy, can’t talk to you now” and ends with, “I am sorry, I won’t do it again”. These are all lies, or I would like to believe they are for now. For example, if someone is really stuck in a jam and they want to get wherever are needed, first thing they would call and apologize, people don’t apologize or make excuses later on because they feel sorry or obliged, they do so cos they want to save their jobs or get out of  a bad situation. I might be wrong, but I think most people agree that to avoid any conflict we tell such simple lies. The one about being busy, is not much of a lie, its a signal for the ones who are trying to talk to you, it means get lost I will call you when I need you, otherwise I don’t give a damn about you (sorry for the language but it’s true) and the last one, about being sorry, no one means sorry when they say it, at least not anymore, people who mean it, show it, in their actions.

So from that quick analysis we have concluded, everybody lies. It might sound like something you heard on House (in case, you haven’t seen it, you are missing out on something) but the fact is, its true. I got the initial idea from there only, but I became sure when people around me started lying. My friends lie to me all the time, I accept it because I know the alternative is to not be friends with them, which is stupid because even I lie to them. Funny, how human beings go from fighting about ownership issues on a pencil case to lying flat to their friends about why they don’t want to talk to them. Its simple enough on some level and a lie on another. We all like to believe that lies make life easier, they don’t really. Lies are just lies, they are needed sometime because one wants to be polite, or one is just a jerk, whatever may be the reason, good or bad, a lie is still a lie. The question I ask myself is, do I want to be lied to? If I expect honesty from one human being, I owe them honesty too. That’s the reason answer. Honesty is a deal, a pact, you give and take.

I don’t want some people to lie to me, ever. It is because their opinions matter or because I love them so much, or just because they are the center of all my thoughts. But doesn’t our parents lie about tooth fairies and Santa Claus? How viable is their lie? They are not, if you think about it, but does their lie make a difference to how one perceives the world? Probably not. Does their lie shatter anyone’s whole existence? Only if you are Santa Claus or tooth fairy. So, their lie is completely harmless. Sometimes, their lies are harmful as well. Every time a parent lies they are just telling their kids its okay to lie. I know it sounds cruel, but isn’t it better to accept the world is harsh that make stories about how wonderful it is. I know I am going to be a terrible mother 😛

I haven’t concluded anything, just gave an insight into a lesson I learnt today, lying makes you human, being a liar doesn’t. Choose the lies carefully, don’t hurt anyone with them, and don’t create illusions you know will break, don’t try to help with lies, lies do not help. I have decided to be honest with some people in my life, cos I think they deserve it. I hope some people, if anyone ever reads this, they should also do the same. Be honest. Its not such a bad thing. It might save your life, and it would definitely save your heart.

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